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My viewing of Saturday Night Live was interrupted by shouts of my name.

Curious, I went back to the living room and found that a collection was being taken to get me to give Alice a sensual massage then and there. The person really needing convincing was Alice, who kept saying “No”.

After a day or two we’d find something to argue about again, but for a while there was peace.

Two years ago Alice, a long-divorced friend of my mother’s was getting married, so mom threw her a bachelorette party.

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It was a lot of fun and made me open to the use of candles, oil and taking your time with the opposite sex.

It even helped my relationship with my difficult and demanding mother, for I would give her a neck and shoulder or foot massage occasionally.

An hour later my mother and two friends knocked on the door, escorting a wobbly Alice. Alice still resisted, which was why they were escorting her.

Mom and friends came back to check on her about then. More argument followed, then Alice finally agreed, so long as she could keep her bra on.

They convinced her to get her hands out of the robe sleeves and turn over on her stomach so that I could do her back. Mom’s drunk friend Betty would have none of that and unfastened Alice’s bra herself with a scream of delight. I locked the door behind them and stopped Alice from re-hooking her bra.“Just keep your arms at your sides and I won’t see a thing” I smiled.

But there's also a big chance you'll come across a profile and see someone you know, it could be a secretary from your work, a girl you remember from high school or your ex-girlfriend.

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